Rocked.

My world was rocked almost two months ago when everything I knew and trusted about (former) Hill Crest director, Isaac, came crashing down right in front of me. When we bought the lumber for the roof of the project in October, he lied to me about the payment and payment agreement. So on January 14^th, I found myself at the lumber yard surrounded by angry employees, abandoned by him, locked in an office, almost arrested and forced to sign a contract. I was crying and shaking so badly I could hardly use my phone. I was humiliated that Isaac was the reason for all of this so I didn’t want to call anyone and tell them what was happening. Thankfully, the police officer that arrived recognized that he could not arrest me and gave me a ride. It was then that I called my former housemate and best friend in Arusha, Hans, and met him at our friends’ house where I sobbed into him for a few minutes before telling him everything that happened. He said it was all a setup, as did everyone else I told over the next few weeks. If you know me, you know how hard it is for me to cry in front of people. The fact that I melted into Hans and then six of my other friends should tell you how absolutely traumatized I was by what happened.

If those boys had not received me and comforted me the way they did, I would have gotten on a plane home that night and not looked back. I would be home saying, “yeah it was a good two years.” I would be getting back on society’s assembly line. I would be looking into going back to school this summer, getting a job, and hoping to create the white picket fence life in a couple of years. I would be returning to false happiness. I was so close to losing everything I love. I was about to go back to the life I was so miserable in because I knew there was no way to recover my relationship with Isaac after what he did that morning, which meant my time at Hill Crest was over also. It isn’t easy being betrayed in a foreign country by the first person who is supposed to take care of you. I spent three days cooped up in my apartment before I gathered the courage to tell the three people who needed to know; my mom, dad, and Bernard, the American who “adopted” the construction of the project shortly after we bought the lumber in October. I met Bernard in a café in town, crying as I told him. Before I finished, he was calling his people to get things taken care of. That night I had to tell my parents. I went through a strange range of emotions. Would they be disappointed in me? Or mad, or make me go home…would they stop trusting my judgment, would they regret sending me here? How could I tell them what happened? For some reason, I thought they would be disappointed in me. They weren’t. For those few days, I was realizing everything I thought I lost. I would not be welcomed at Hill Crest again; I lost my kids. I couldn’t imagine facing Isaac again; I lost him. His wife had become my mama, my sister, my friend, my rock and root; I lost Elizabeth. Two days prior, I moved into an apartment far away from my friends and close to Hill Crest, now a mistake. I was scared to pass the lumber yard on my way to town. I was relieved nobody knew yet where my new apartment was, at least Isaac wouldn’t show up on my doorstep with the police. That was the only sense of relief I felt for a long time.

I also thought I was going to lose the project but then I heard that Isaac said he would keep things peaceful and stay away from the project. The next day, he changed and said he was going to fight. That’s when Bernard called in the “big dogs” and my dad flew in. Isaac didn’t know what a mistake he made by making things vicious. The people that came to my side are powerful and Isaac had no grounds to stand on. It came out that he was here illegally since 2008. Hill Crest was not a registered school. He was probably planning on taking the project for himself when it was done. He told the court that I was stealing project money and spending it on boys at the clubs. He tried to say that the money for the project didn’t even come through me. He made a fool of himself and ruined his chances of winning the fight. Over the six days that my dad was in town, we were in a hearing and then had meetings with some of the most powerful people in Arusha. They asked me what I wanted to happen to Isaac, and at that point I just wanted to scare him. I wanted him to know that I wasn’t messing around anymore and that he had better not come near me or the project, but I needed assurance that his wife and kids would be taken care of. I was in complete denial that his wife knew about anything he had done over the last two years; partly because I know my heart just wouldn’t have been able to handle betrayal by Elizabeth, partly because I genuinely believed she knew nothing.

Over time, the truth unfolded and my respect for Isaac diminished. His life was being revealed and it was horrifying. Everything I knew about him was a lie and the truth was disgusting. He is a coward and a pathetic excuse for a man. Now, even Elizabeth thinks every word that came out of his mouth was a lie. I know that because, as I suspected, she knew nothing.

After two weeks, we came up with an agreement that put me on top and let him walk away. I would get the project and Hill Crest, he would not get arrested or deported. He refused to sign and walked out of that meeting on February 3^rd and that was the last we have seen or heard from him. Because he is Kenyan, we realized later that he did not even need to sign the agreement. Elizabeth, as a Tanzanian, was the one that needed to sign. She did.

The trouble that Isaac tried to get me into ultimately ended with me as director of Hill Crest, owner of the project, and now a CEO of a company that I just registered in Tanzania. I am also being given land to develop into a community project through my company. Isaac gets to live in hiding. He knows the police are looking for him, and when he is found he will face the law. Sure, he left us in debt and I spent all of my savings recovering Hill Crest, but I can find more money. I would never be able to replace my kids, my relationships, or my life here.

I’m thankful for everything he put me through. It’s still a very open wound and writing this has been a challenge, but I would never have known the strength I possess. I’ve learned to fight, to stand up for myself, and to defend the kids. The passive person that I was for 23 years is gone and I welcome challenges now. Elizabeth and I are working hard to restore the integrity of Hill Crest and turn it back into the school it was before Isaac chased her away and lied to me about everything. We have a lot of work to do and it is going to be a long road to recovery, but it will happen. Nobody is going to stop me now. I would like to see someone try.